Hey LeBron, add Ron Artest to your motivational list.
If you ask the Los Angeles Lakers' Ron Artest, the biggest NBA signing of the summer wasn't LeBron James leaving Cleveland to go to Miami as a free agent; it was Kevin Durant extending his contract with the Thunder to stay in Oklahoma City.
"He's the second best player in the NBA," Artest said of Durant, ranking the youngest scoring champion in league history behind only teammate Kobe Bryant.
"Kobe's got five rings, six game winners [last season], 23-straight points in [Game 5 of the Finals] off mostly jump shots," Artest elaborated. "[He's] the biggest shot maker, big shot maker. So, that said, Durant's the second best player in the NBA."
When asked where James ranks on his list, Artest excluded the back-to-back MVP from consideration.
"I only count to two," Artest said. "I've been out of school 15 years, so I only count to two."
A truly spectacular dig by Ron-Ron. He wouldn't even mention LeBron's name.
Bahahahahaha!
Editor's Note: An alternate headline was considered for this post. Here's the editorial discussion between John and myself on IM:
me: what is less offensive: "pisses all over" or "takes a steamy dump on"
And that is a sneak peek into the genius behind this website.